Being Sad...

mommy sent me via email the card that minette's coworker did for her memorial at the golf and country club that she worked for. the card has minette's pictures all over. i cried when i saw these pictures. i felt really sad seeing this pictures again. the first time i saw the photos was when minette was still alive, she used to email me her photos when we were chatting and sharing updates on her adventures and whereabouts. it made me realized that minette is no longer with us. the "what ifs" flashing through my mind. i know she is now in a better place where she will no longer feel lonely and alone. she is now happy. i also know that she wants us all to be happy. maybe minette's purpose was to keep us, her family together, to keep us together even though we are miles apart. ever since they migrated to america, there were no longer a family occassion that was celebrated with all of us together. and now... we will never be complete as a family without minette. i remember speaking with her on the phone hearing her laughter. these are all memories now, happy memories that i shared with my sister.

we have accepted the loss, but we still can't help but to feel sad whenever we remember her. this coming august, mommy and daddy will bring home minette's ashes here in manila. my brothers will also be home then. after our reunion 7 months ago (on my wedding), we never expected to see each other again on this kind of occassion. couple of months after my wedding, we were planning of seeing my brother in dubai this year, of going to the beach on an island in the philippines also this year, and of travelling and going around the world in the next years to come. i know minette still want us to continue with our plans, our plans of always being together, kahit wala na siya. minette wants us to always keep in touch with each other, to always keep us together, and be there for each other.

this is very difficult for us. we will always pray for my sister, and she will forever be lovingly remembered.